“EVERYTHING HURTS.”

TONIGHT…

he told me he met a girl. He was actually asking my opinion whether he would add her on facebook or not. For the second time, he was asking my opinion about a girl. Well, the first time was when his crush talked to him. He was so happy that he doesn’t talk to me for like a month. Then he came back, and told me it was not worth it. And here we go again. Me being the girl who would told him whether he is doing the right thing or not. I told him not to add her because it would be too creepy. But there was another reason behind it, I was afraid. I was afraid that the same thing would happen again. I was afraid that the guy that keeps me company will ignore me again. He even told me that she’s not that pretty and he can’t understand why he is feeling that way, like he want to get to know her. Now, he’s feeling what I’m feeling, to like someone not totally your type. 

girlbehindthisblog:

That moment where you need to pretend that you’re okay even though you’re dying inside because someone need you. They need someone who will listen to them. They need your shoulder to cry on. they need your hug. All you can do is be there for them. You don’t want to tell them that you’re not okay…

I texted him in the middle of the night. I was at a party. I was drinking, for the first time. It was just a cup, it really had no effect on me. I texted him, maybe because I missed him or because I wanted him to be the one I will talked to if ever I get drunk. Maybe by then I’ll have the guts to tell him how confused I am for liking him but yeah, I like him. And the party is kinda boring. They are playing some drinking games and I just don’t want to join. It was one of the nights that I seriously wanted to talked to him. The times when I thought talking to him would keep me company. I thought he would somehow feel special. But it seems like he doesn’t get it. He was not wrong when he told me not to talk to him and just mind the party. But idk, I was hurt. Maybe because he doesn’t know that I prefer talking to him than talking to anyone at the party and all I can do is to say okay and press send.

“People think they know you. They think they know how you’re handling a situation. But the truth is no one knows. No one knows what happens after you leave them, when you’re lying in bed or sitting over your breakfast alone and all you want to do is cry or scream. They don’t know what’s going on inside your head—the mind-numbing cocktail of anger and sadness and guilt. This isn’t their fault. They just don’t know. And so they pretend and they say you’re doing great when you’re really not. And this makes everyone feel better. Everybody but you.”
— William H. Woodwell Jr.  (via hisworkofart)

(via geesilog)

Smile through the tears. Don’t ever let them see you cry. Don’t make them feel like they’re worth your tears.

Smile through the tears. Don’t ever let them see you cry. Don’t make them feel like they’re worth your tears.

I wonder…

I wonder if you also talk to me because you miss me…
I wonder if you stay up late just to have a conversation…
I wonder if you think of me at night…
I wonder if you also feel the butterflies in your stomach whenever you see me…
I wonder if I was one of your priorities or just really an option…
I wonder if you hate me for all the things I’ve said and done…
I wonder if you’ll be there when I need you…
I wonder if I am special to you or I was just assuming that I am…
I wonder if you’ll cry when I’m gone and recognize my worth even for just a moment…
I wonder if you miss me like I miss you or…
If you liked me the way I liked you…
I wonder if we’ll be together someday or maybe…
Just maybe…
We’re just good as friends…